Tag Archives: adventure

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My Hero: My Journey Through Psalms (71-72)

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From the time that I was a little girl, I have always loved hero stories. Even now, these are my favorite stories to teach. A hero receives a call to adventure, grabs a couple of friends, departs for an unknown world, manages the trials and crises,  and then returns home, triumphant with a prize that regales the people with his bravery and heroism. In fact, my fondest memories are centered around watching a show or movie about a hero and then acting out the roles with my BFFs. First, it was the Ninja Turtles, then Power Rangers and Captain Planet, but I rarely wanted to be THE hero. Typically, I chose the ‘weakest’ hero or even the ‘damsel in distress’. My favorite  thing was pretending I needed to be rescued–and then feeling a RUSH when I was–even if it was only from make-believe monsters and villains.

As a child, it was easy for me to embrace the weaknesses and recognize that heroes should be greater than I.

As an adult, well, it’s a lesson I still have to learn sometimes…okay, a lot of times…okay, daily.

In Psalm 71, David is quick to recognize his own weaknesses: “Rescue me and deliver me into your righteousness,” he calls. And then, “turn your ear and save me.” The poet cries out. Because heroes must receive a call to action for the adventure to begin, and it is only through the adventure that rescuing can occur. As a child, I thrilled in my voice echoing through the neighborhood, signaling to my ‘hero’ I needed help, but today I often let my pride overcome that inner desire for a hero to rescue me. And I remain silent.

It is in that silence that I am bound and captive. 

My hero wants to save me. He keeps the lines open and his ears tuned in…waiting…but I do not call.

And without that call, my hero’s Status Quo remains stagnant. No growth can happen unless my hero and I take that adventure head on.

My enemy seizes this opportunity–thrilled to strike while I am still bound. They say, “God has forsaken him [or her]; pursue him [or her] for no one will rescue him [or her]” (v. 11).

Because you simply cannot be rescued if you don’t call for help. Even David, a mighty and brave warrior recognized this: “For he will deliver the needy who cry out, the afflicted who have no one to help […] and save the needy from death”(72:12-13)

And so I dig deep, searching for the little girl I once was. The girl who thrilled to be rescued, who realized that only when you are weak and vulnerable will your hero come and save you. Because the proud and strong don’t see the need for a hero. They shut him out and claim “I’m okay” and “I can do it myself”.

But I can’t.

The weaker I become, the stronger I must lean on the original hero.

Really, the only hero.

My hero.

My God.

Because my God “will endure as long as the sun, as long as the moon and through all the generations” (72:5), which is what all heroes aim to achieve, but only the ultimate hero can, and will, achieve!

 

Learn it

God is a Romantic

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I’ve always been a realist. I like things to be tangible, logical, accountable. If I can see, taste and touch it then I can account for how and why something happened, make good decisions, and accurately assess the consequences—both good and bad. This is how I live my life. Boring? Perhaps. Predictable? I suppose. To me, it’s safe, understandable, stable…

It’s not that bad things don’t happen to me, that is not what I mean, but that I usually understand why both good and bad happen because I can analyze the reality of the situation…usually.

Unfortunately I was convicted this week by my safe, stable environment. The fact that my world is so secure, is not necessarily good. Because God is not a realist.

God is a Romantic, probably the ultimate Romantic. And the stories he writes for each of us is more beautiful and full of inexplicable, delightful acts of love full of as much passion as we will allow. And that’s just the thing. My nature is limiting to God. Not that I control him, but I continually try to control what he is and what he does in my life to keep everything in order. Safe. Secure. Real.

How depressing.

Instead of experiencing the awesome power and passion that God has in store for me, I try to tell God when and where I need it, like I know better than he does.

But I don’t.

Intellectually, I recognize this, but intellectually is really the problem so I am working on a heart transplant. Becoming more open, freeing myself from this mind trap of realism and shifting my attitude toward the possibilities. As I told my students when we studied American Romanticism: Romantics see what could be, realists see what is.

Expecting more from God invites him to work his incredible and awesome power into our lives, and that passion shakes things up and shows us what it means to truly be alive. After all, we should live, not just be.

So this is my prayer: Lord, free me from my own limitations. I want to see your power and presence at work in my life even if it rocks my world…especially if it rocks my world. Amen.

mountain

 

Character, Learn it

Practical or Brave?

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I’ve been reading Oswald Chambers My Utmost for His Highest devotions. It’s not the first time I’ve gone through these, but every time I do I always learn something new about myself and my relationship with God. I’ve been ruminating on these words for the past few days: “Let God’s truth work in you by soaking in it, not by worrying into it…Obey God in the thing He shows you, and instantly the next thing is opened up.”

One of my major faults is worry. I have this major control problem, where I want to plan everything out in meticulous detail, with contingency plans and back ups for my back ups. Let me be frank, that gets exhausting. Especially because Robert Burns was absolutely right, “The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” So when my plans don’t work out, it feel like a failure, and the problem with that is—life can’t be meticulously planned out. It just doesn’t work that way. And because I feel like it should be, I feel like my life is a complete failure.

I’ll be honest with you, this is not what I pictured my life to be like when I was 15 and planning out my future (I had it ALL PLANNED OUT!). Like most little girls, I was going to be married, with 2.5 kids, living in a suburb. I’d have a mortgage, a dog, a fenced in yard, and I’d be writing novels while taking my kids to soccer practice and church picnics. I’d be a model wife, a pillar of the community. I’d be a master baker, bringing in cupcakes and homemade bread for church functions and school PTA meetings. Once my kids were all in school I’d go back to teaching.

That’s not what my life looks like. And to be fair, I kind of shudder when I think about that being my life, too. It’s what I planned, but it’s not what God had in the cards for my life. I struggled for years feeling like a failure because I’d been rejected in multiple ways. I don’t bake (unless, you know, it comes out of a can and all I have to do is put it on a cookie sheet. Even then, there’s a 50/50 shot I’ll forget it’s in the oven and burn it anyway). I don’t cook (I worry too much about it being “perfect” and then I end up making something awful 7/10 times). I’m not married. No kids. No mortgage. My life isn’t what I planned, but…

That’s not what failure means. I’m still figuring out what God’s truth is for me. One thing I learned, was that I have to stop being so damn practical all the time. Yes, having a plan and a goal is important, it’s how I function. BUT having time to be spontaneous, fun, and brave is how I end up growing. I watch this TV Show called “Jane the Virgin”. (I know, I know, this show is not wonderful; it’s cheesy, racy, and a little on the “what the what?!?!” side of soap opera-ville. But we’ll call it a guilty pleasure). A question that is asked of the main character when she is in high school: what do you want to be? And she counters with “Am I being practical or brave?”

So can you be both practical and brave?

Oswald Chambers ended his devotional with “Beware of becoming “wise and prudent”. I don’t think that means we should stop seeking wisdom, but rather we should stop trying to become so wise that we forget who holds the ultimate Wisdom and Truth for our lives. It’s so easy to become wrapped up in our own practical truths, that we forget to trust our future to the one who knows us better than we know ourselves. We forget to be brave.

So that is my goal. To let go of my plans and soak in God’s truth. Because when you do that, doors open. And you just never know where those doors might lead.

Character, Learn it, Teaching

The Pavement Ends

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I was driving a couple of weeks ago, rushing from one place to another and not paying attention like I should. As a result, I missed the sign.

Pavement ends.

At 45 miles an hour this is an especially important sign to not miss, but just as I realized what was about to happen, it was too late–off I flew into a dirt and gravel road.

I won’t repeat all the words or thoughts that raced in my head or out of my mouth as the dust flew up around my car, but as I finally came to a grinding, horrifying halt–surrounded by a cloud of dust and miraculously unscathed–I ended with:

“Thank you God for protecting me even in my stupidity.”

What an appropriate expression of gratitude.

We live in a world of narcissism and self-promotion. A world that screams “Me! Me! ME!” and then “More! More! More!” and sometimes we get so wrapped up in that we forget to pay attention. Until the pavement ends.

Until something gets our attention.

Often there were warning signs, but we either ignore them or don’t see them in our ignorance. Those are moments of truth where we can either learn something or continue on a path of destruction. It’s time for us to stop allowing distractions keep us from the truth that is right in front of us…before the pavement ends.

After praying my thanksgiving, I turned my car around and got back on the pavement, but this time I slowed down, put away the distractions, and continually praised God as I drove out of my studpidity and into his arms.

Write it, Writing process

Tis’ The Season: Writing Conferences #SheSpeaks2015

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Excited.

Jittery.

Anxious.

Nervous.

No, I’m not just reading out of a thesaurus; I’m getting ready for my very first writer’s conference.

*Insert squeal of an eight year old blonde girl in ringlets*

Yes, because that is how I feel inside. Granted, I’ve never squealed in my life—well maybe when I was eight, but even then it’s unlikely. I’m not much of a squealer (whining I did a lot of, but squealing…not so much). That in no way means I don’t get excited about things, because I am pumped.

I don’t know what this conference will bring.

Maybe nothing.

Maybe something.

And that is what is so exciting!

Not knowing the outcome means the possibilities are endless. Which also means I have very few expectations. And being amenable to a wide variety of outcomes means I can be satisfied no matter what happens in the end.

Okay, so we’re entering the gushing realm here, so I’ll refrain from going on and on and ask a couple of questions:

What kinds of writing conferences have you attended and what did you get out of them?

Evidently—tis the season! I follow a lot of blogs and everyone is talking about the conference season in full swing, so I want to know what’s out there, what’s going on, and what is the experience.

The conference I am attending is entitled “She Speaks” which is specifically for Christian writers and speakers.

I am not a speaker.

Oddly, though, because I am not a speaker, this conference appealed more to me. I’d like to be a speaker. Or rather, I’d like to be able to get up in front of a crowd and talk about my writing, hopes and dreams and to be able to encourage others to seek their own hopes and dreams without wishing that the floor would swallow me whole and send me straight to Fiji!

I know, I know. I’m a teacher—I should be an expert public speaker.

No—speaking in front of pre-pubescent, and pubescent pimple popping punks, princesses and princes (I love teenagers!) is completely different than speaking in front of a crowd of peers. Believe me. If you don’t, try it some time. You’ll see.

And I’m not saying it’s easier either, it’s just different.

My point is, I’d like to be a better speaker, so this conference has perks in more than one way—including networking prospects.

Even though my expectations are wide open, I have signed up for my track and so for those of you who follow (and those of you who pray) I’d appreciate your thoughts and prayers during these times! You’re my support and I want to make sure that I get the most out of this experience that I can; the only way I can do that is to call on ALL my support—and that includes YOU!

(Oh, and I know the dangers of posting this on the internet—but be warned I have a pit bull at my house and she’ll protect it while I’m gone—plus it’s not empty. I’m not stupid.)

Thursday 7/23

1-2 welcome, worship, devotion

-I love that the conference starts out with worship and devotion. The only way any of this work can be truly blessed is if it is DEVOTED back to the ONE who blessed me in the first place. AMEN.

2:15-3:15 Finding something to talk about

-Now, we all know that I have a lot to say, but this is about avoiding procrastination, and this kind of direction—focused direction can be helpful to someone who has been talking about being a writer since she was…six? And is just now doing something about it (hey—I’m going to be 30 in a month…better late than never, right?)

3:35-4:35 What is a platform and Why do I need one? Blogging 101

-Now, I’ve been blogging for a while, but I could definitely be better (and more consistent) with it. And building a platform is important—and not easy. I am looking forward to this. Suggestions bloggers? Always welcome

5:15-6:15 How to title your book and carry its theme throughout

-I always title my books LAST because I believe that the title should be carried throughout—so if it isn’t after I title the book then I can make those changes as I edit. I wonder what suggestions they’ll have in this workshop because I’ll admit that titling is NOT my forte.

Friday 7/24

9:30-11 General session

11:20-12:20 Social media and panel discussion

-I could always use help (and advice) in improving my PR.

2-3: Storytelling on the page

-During this I will also be meeting with a publisher. My appointment is at 2pm. It will likely only last about 15 minutes. PLEASE pray at 2pm on Friday if you pray at no other time during the conference. I don’t know if this publisher will be right for me or not, but it will be a good experience and I would like to make a good impression as it is an important contact regardless of how it turns out.

 3:30-5:30 Track meetings (Word power equals Sales Power; Overcoming procrastination) 

-At 3:30 I will also take time to meet with an agent. Again, I don’t know if this agent will be interested or right for me either, but also an important experience and contact and I want to make a good impression.

8:15-9:45 Main session

Saturday 7/25

8:30-9:30 welcome, worship, morning devo

9:50-10:50 Getting things done in ministry on a budget

-I find that many times people don’t like to talk about the financial aspects of writing and publishing. It needs more attention because it isn’t cheap! And you don’t make millions.

 11:10-12:10 Take the mystery out of marketing

-Ahhhhh, that WOULD be helpful.

1:15-2:15 Memoir writing

-A genre I haven’t tackled and haven’t thought about until recently…details to come.

2:45-5:45 bonus session (critique groups)

7-8:30 main session

8:30-9:30 dessert and mingle

As you can see, it’s a PACKED agenda and I’m excited. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, if you do nothing other than just pray a little for me over the next few days I’d appreciate you—but more importantly pray for all the women at this conference because speaking and writing CAN make a difference in this crazy mixed up world of ours and the fact that there are so many women who want to try to make a difference really is a beautiful thing.

So Tis’ the Season to get your conference on.